Blues for Red

by Tom Bauer

I’m looking in crowds

where you won’t be

looking for you

strolling with Raphael

humming, loaded on caffeine

café au lait, iced mochachino

coffee, whipped cream, chocolate, steamed milk

a love supreme on our lips

chanting as we walk, talk, laugh, hoot, grimace

and grin, tabling topics

stamping in our rutting, lonely strutting

until my friend suggests a test:

 

don’t laugh at anyone, don’t put them down

for three blocks to the music store

don’t rant because we don’t have love

don’t complain about weightlifters and ugly people

homeless persons, drunks, druggies begging coins

flashy dressers, just try, try, try instead

to see them children be this Coltrane, be it, see it

angels everywhere, in everyone

though none like you, Red, looking for you

in downtown crowds, looking for you

at the Montreal Cosmos show

looking for you, tall, legs, red, hair

that, smile, that, beauty

why beauty? Why you?

 

To help me think of something, not you

that’s why, something not as easy as God

as easy through prayer comes God

in everything the air vibrating, God

the mass, moving, smoking, littering, God

heat reflecting on cars, God

glare of sunlight on streets, God

a love supreme

lifting me, thinking about our jam, yeah

blues for red, piano, bass, yeah

a love, su, preme

luck be a vessel

looking for lover, you in the crowd

looking where you won’t

be living in the memory

the feel of you, tall, in my arms

the feel of your neck, my lips, your smile

when you smiled

to make sure I would lick and

the light in your eyes when I said I would

for hours and hours, smiling in mind

visions, trying to find you

downtown where you cannot be, hoping

willing, just to see, see you

someone just to forget

some other someone I can talk to

the way I talked with you, music here

watching, you, paint, more art, more life

someone, love, a lover, more lover

red like you, freckled, fair, skin

the sun above, skies blue, Raphael

great big smile checking

every woman, pretty, sexy, tall

he likes them tall this short man does

blond arrogant face

lover of hot food and women, music

life, traffic, a love supreme

moving, how many?

in a city of three million, how many?

not counting over thirty-five

under twenty-two, married, not for me

speaking languages I never learned

not into music, math, art, science

not into love, forget blondes, brunettes

non-freckled women without red hair, under five-six

eliminate all and maybe more chance, Carl Sagan

of alien civilizations on other planets

less than ten? Five? maybe it’s one, maybe it’s true

only one, only you, only love, one chance

maybe one, one where I find it

only in dreams, me meeting

finding you, flying, living, music, learned

free, you, your arms again

here, now, angel, you now, visitor now

long-time friend come back to fly

me to the stars in our love supreme.